Congirl, Interrupted - Part I

Are you a congirl or a cavegirl? I used to think I was congirl—a cool convention goer. I thought I was modern. I traveled across the country by myself to attend a convention for the TV show Supernatural with an awesome friend. We went to a concert. Met the actors. Had a blast! What could be more cosmopolitan? But I found out the hard way I am just a cavegirl. I unconsciously followed a few instincts that influenced my behavior—and my mood. How's that, you ask? Glad you did. 'Cause you might be a cavedweller, too.

Here's how it all went down...

Like the CW series Supernatural, it started simply enough. I came across the show in syndication by chance. Two brothers hunt down evil and take it out. They were pretty bad-ass and just plain pretty. Somehow I had missed twelve seasons of classic rock, creative plot twists and sarcastic one-liners. I learned about the arc of each season, the creator, and the actors online with a few taps of my finger. That action became the first cavegirl impulse of three that I unconsciously began using as a fan of something—and I had not been a fan of anything in a while. You see, foraging by using the least amount of energy possible was one of the habits we Homo sapiens used to keep ourselves alive during our cave-dwelling days…and there are very few things easier than tapping one's finger. Before I knew it, I was not only binge-watching episodes of Supernatural, but also convention panels, montage clips, interviews, gag-reels, and Facebook feeds of lead actors Jared Padalecki, Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins. I was able to saturate myself with all the images and information I wanted about the show and about them—so much so that I started looking at life through what other fans called a “J2” lens: I would hear a new song and be certain Jensen would like it. I'd think of a movie and wonder if Jared had also seen it. It was slightly disturbing! When I was a teenager, there was no internet, so it was harder to get extra information about shows, actors or bands I liked. So I didn't bother. But now I had access to a lot more—effortlessly.

Although all my "foraging" seemed relatively harmless, it was not all that good for me. In fact, it was pretty isolating. Eventually, I found out that a cousin also liked Supernatural, and we decided to go to a convention together. The only one we could both attend was in New Jersey, and I lived in California. Was I really going to travel 5,000 miles for a girls' weekend? The answer was surprisingly yes! I felt compelled to go. So did my cousin, who was just as confused at her behavior as I was of mine. Like me, she did not immediately know anyone who liked the show as much as she did. We could not believe what we were doing! Turned out we were using our cavegirl brains again. We were seeking social groups—the second of the three evolutionary habits we had tapped into. Once again, this action seemed harmless. It was exciting! But my uncharacteristic seeking behavior eventually caught up with me.

Now the third cave girl behavior that I was employing is possibly the most prevalent, and I bet you do it too. Turns out, we beat out the Neanderthals in the evolutionary race for dominance because we were better at solving problems. But we were also really good at finding problems—and still are. We all know people who seem to have everything they need, yet they complain that what they have is not enough, or not good enough. But these thoughts to do not make "sense" in modern society. We no longer have to hunt to survive, but we are still on the look-out for something “better”: a better car, a better place to live, even a better life. It seems our species could be hard-wired to be dissatisfied, and my cavegirl brain was in over-drive. My cousin and I were going to great lengths to attend a convention—something was suddenly missing from our lives, and we wanted more.

The convention was a bit overwhelming at first, but my cousin and I had a great time. We were both new to the “SPN” family. Everyone we met was super-nice and many were attending their second or third con. We were shocked since the tickets were so expensive.  A few attendees (aka fellow cavegirls) admitted that they are going into debt in order to attend, but felt it was worth it for them. The vendor room had anything Supernatural that you could possibly need: journals, jewelry, shirts, pillows, totes, and even shoes worn by the actors during filming. The adjoining conference room was enormous. There were hundreds of black folding chairs in neat rows, and the stage was flanked by two giant projector screens. Simple black curtains defined the spaces. Saturday's Q&A panels were good, especially Misha's. He tried not to cry as he told us a story about how his young son shared his own birthday pirate treasure with the homeless…validating my traveling all this way and spending all this money. 

Sunday arrived and it was big! Two panels with Jared and Jensen, and I would get my 8x10 personally signed by each of them. It was a picture of a specific scene from their first day of shooting that Jensen had mentioned as the exact moment he thought he and Jared had chemistry as actors. The scene was shot at a library in Glendale, California—my hometown. But there was a snag. The convention schedule was off, so the actors wouldn't be signing until much later than expected. By the time our row was called to join the line, it was close to 9:00 pm. The convention staff started to break everything down around the tables where Jared and Jensen diligently scribbled away. The black chairs were being stacked. The curtains between the vendor hall and the main hall were starting to come down. Forklifts were beeping as they moved piles of tables down the corridors created by the remaining black curtains. And behind those black curtains were Jared and Jensen—meeting people, signing things! Jensen was having quick chats with some of the fans as we approached his table, smiling and relaxed as the world dissolved around him. He had been at this for 12 hours. We would wait. It would be worth it. We hoped...

Did you live the 70’s or 80’s? Do you wish you had??

Listen to the soundtrack for Congirl, Interrupted - Part I

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/026xJnpQadsXzSap3OLqlD?si=RT0LiWDnSRuP5YMvSMLY2g

References for “Con Girl, Interrupted” (Parts I and II)

Bakow, Jerome H., Cosmides, Leda and Tooby, John. (Eds.) 1992. The Adapted Mind: Evolutionary Psychology and the Generation of Culture, New York: Oxford Press.

Baym, N. (2012.) Fans or Friends? Seeing Social Media Audiences as Musicians Do. Journal of Audience and Reception Studies, Vol 9 (286-316.) https://pdfs.semanticscholar.org/0f72/5b3189d7261e9ab9c4a8dfda34619ecb4f38.pdf

Marick, A.E. and Boyd, D. (2010.) I Tweet Honestly, I Tweet Passionately: Twitter Users, Context Collapse and the Imagined Audience. Online First, New Media Society, July. http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1461444810365313

Matlby, J. et al. (2004.) Celebrity Worship, Cognitive Flexibility and Social Complexity. Personality and Individual Differences, Vol 37.  https://www.researchgate.net/publication/233858415_Celebrity_worship_cognitive_flexibility_and_social_complexity

Nicholson, N. (1998.) How Hardwired is Human Behavior? Harvard Business Review, July-Aug.  https://hbr.org/1998/07/how-hardwired-is-human-behavior

Quirk J. (2006.) Sperm are from Men, Eggs are from Women: The Real Reason Men and Women are Different. Pennsylvania: Running Press Book Publishers.

van Vugt, M. (2017.) Evolutionary Psychology: Theoretical Foundations for the Study of Organizations. Journal of Organizational Design, Research Primer Series.  https://jorgdesign.springeropen.com/articles/10.1186/s41469-017-0019-9

Zubernis, L. and Larsen, K. (2012.) Fandom at the Crossroads; Celebration, Shame and Fan/Producer Relationships. UK: Cambridge Scholars Publishing.

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